Time for me to take a break from Hannah’s bush to write a blog she practically forced me, at will, in the library with a lead pipe, to write. She tagged me with a major award. I am waiting for the crate to arrive, soon to be displayed in all its glory in my front window.
It was the Liebster Blog Award, a bloggers award that comes with conditions as well as a little logo the awardee can post in their blog. It’s conditional blog love. I love conditional blog love. I love love. Lover’s love love. I’m a lover, not a fighter. The heart in the award logo should prove that.
Hannah named me because I am witty, wistful and rude along with a few other things, including reserved, probably also true but maybe not. OK. It’s totally true. I also stalk her and her delicious mounds of ice cream. She’s having a banana split tonight, which when mentioned in a lewd way seems like an oxymoron. Outside of this blog, I have a tendency to let my guard down, so a few like Hannah see my “guard down” side, which is a lot like seeing me with a beer in me. Not pretty.
Ah, but now for the conditions (rules) that come with the award. The award recipient must thank the person who nominated you, answer their questions 11, then award 11 other bloggers who in turn must answer your 11 questions. Those awarded should have less that 200 followers (which really explains why I am a Liebster). My challenge is that I don’t think I am yet following 11 WordPress blogs. Some I am following are already established and accomplished, so they will merely scoff at me if I nominate them.
Hah! Heh! Be gone with you, lowly SHenryDaFrankMann, worm that you are!
Thank you, H. Stern, not only for the award but for the incredibly inspiring humor your blog provides, irreverent and vulnerable, a break for me that allows me to let down my guard, loosen up, and be the person I rarely get to show to the outside world (although my guess is that people still see me that way). Teeny forced your blog down my throat and I should also thank her for that. I look forward to reading your blogs, feel almost too comfortable evidenced by my comments there. Also, thanks for leaving dinner for me by your bush.
Time to answer those questions 11.
1. What made you start blogging?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. WP is my third blog site after being tossed out into the cold by Yahoo and Multiply. The clientele here goes beyond the “I love my kitty” crowd, which I sometimes find pathetic, and I find the writers here to be here for the best reasons — to write. I used to write sketches for the theatre team at my church, five to ten minute vignettes performed each weekend. Our team was dedicated to performing our own work and we had an excellent team of writers, people I really admired. One such writer advised me that the best way to become a better writer is simply to write every day, simple yet sound advice. So I discovered blogging. That was around six years ago. I wrote a lot of sketches for that team, by the way, and was cast in most of them (drat), sketches like “Batman Retires” and “L’ft Ouvre”.
2. You have one month, unlimited funds, and zero repercussions, what do you do?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. I’m torn on this one. One bucket list item is to ride a bicycle across the United States, coast to coast. Boring, eh? OK, then how about I go the prodigal son route, rent a luxury apartment downtown and bed a different expensive prostitute each day? Too nasty? I think so too. And I guess we will find out if my wife reads this blog now.
3. What is your Spirit Animal?
A: Excellent question, Hannah, if I knew what the heck you are talking about. I will just say dog.
4. Remember that one thing you did that you hoped nobody would find out about? Go ahead and tell that story now, mkay?
A: Excellent question, Hannah, and nice try. No freaking way. If my answer to question two doesn’t kill me if my wife reads this blog, this one would. There are some real good ones. That is all I am going to say.
5. If you could have dinner with any 3 people, living or dead, who would you choose?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. Bob Gibson, my favorite St. Louis Cardinal of all time. My grandpa Slagle, who I just miss like nothing else. And Elizabeth Perkins, naked. (Sorry, dear)
6. When was the last time you tried something new and what did you do?
A: Excellent question, Hannah, and this one could also get me in trouble. I am going to cop out on this one. I had foot surgery last January. Call me chicken. Baaaaawwwwkkkk! Get me alone and I might answer this one differently.
7. What is your favorite film of all time?
A. Excellent question, Hannah. Airplane.
8. If you could go 10 years into the past and tell yourself one thing, what would it be?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. I would tell myself to keep after the relationship I have with my wife, tell and show her that I love her every single day. Do not accept no for an answer when I am horny. From my wife, that is.
9. Favorite book(s) of all time?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. I have several. There is an anthology by Henry Kuttner, Robots Tell No Tales. The Fountainhead. Atlas Shrugged. Alas Babylon. Perelandra. Anything Frank Peretti wrote, especially This Present Darkness. Anything David Baldacci writes.
10. I’m thinking of taking a vacation, where should I go?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. Chicago. The best city and the best blogger in the world lives just west of there.
11. Best reason you called in sick to work when you weren’t actually sick at all?
A: Excellent question, Hannah. Unfortunately, that was too long ago for me to remember, but I am sure it was some time during my newlywed days!
My nominees, of which there will not be eleven:
1. Hacken2013 — my best friend I have ever met in blogland. I won’t say too much because she hates it when I hug her. We have shared urinals. Seriously. With her mother. We visited one of our dearest blog friends together less that a year before he died of cancer, something I would not have done had it not been for her. She is an awesome photographer and currently is a fight photographer for the MMA. That is what her site is for but you also are going to find an excellent writer, as well as one of the best senses of humor ever. And I of course can not find a link for her blog (found it).
2. Punky — she is a recent addition and a must read. Humor turns me on and Punky really turns me on. You’ll like how real she is also.
3. Lasesana — Already an accomplished writer, but I have to include her because she is so good.. and a cyclist. I read her just to improve my skills.
4. Teeny — Seriously but not really. Tongue in cheek the best. Cheek in tongue is also likely.
5. This Man’s Journey — Want to get blown away by a guy who puts together a beautiful blog visually and has a genuine love for his family? Read this blog. I have found the guy to be the real deal because what you see on his blog is what comes through in his comments.
I don’t have much more. There is Chris Martin who has an awesome ministry to kids. Or my dear friend, Riete, a teacher in the Netherlands with an awesome heart for God. I gave her the moniker “Pleasantly Disturbed” a few years ago and am proud to see that she still displays that title for her blog header!
There is one doofus that I will recommend, mainly because he just happens to be a cyclist that writes with a flow that I am jealous of. His religious views are screwed up, which is why I am calling him a doof, but he’s all right. His name is James. Anyone who tries to pass himself off as Christian, quotes the Bible, then preaches Buddha, is screwed up in my book. BUT HE WRITES VERY WELL for a doof.
Lincoln and Puppa. This guy loves his grandson and it’s downright awesome to see. See if you agree.
There is one other that I CAN NOT FIND (again) that deserves a lot of mention, Ryan. I thought I was following his blog. Ryan. His dad was my most favorite teacher and coach ever. And the guy can seriously write. I will find him later and add him here.