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Cover of "The Omega Man [Blu-ray]"

Cover of The Omega Man [Blu-ray]

Just once I would like to whack a zombie, the efficient arc of my freshly sharpened machete’ creating a satisfying squish thud (or would that be thud squish?) as blade meets rotted forehead.  I also would like to finish writing a sentence without being interrupted mid word by a 14 year old boy.  There is more chance of the zombie fantasy happening.

I’m looking for zombie volunteers.  Had the Blackhawks not won the Stanley cup this summer there would be plenty of near zombie Cub fans wandering aimlessly around the streets, mindlessly seeking Cardinal fans such as myself to jealously devour.  With the Bears also winning at the moment, even the Cardinals making the playoffs AGAIN will not awaken the slumbering Cub zombies to mayhem, their appetites whetted by the winning ways of other Chicago teams.

Post apocalyptic stories like the Walking Dead, the Omega Man, Alas Babylon, Left Behind all hold a certain appeal.  The thought of living in a world that is suddenly devoid of the responsibilities of life as usual is one that I like, the lines of civility blurred by the rules of survival.  Suddenly it is OK to whomp that zombie, kill or be killed, take what you need to exist.  That annoying guy who shows off all the cool stuff he has, the cars or the boats or clothes or golf clubs, no longer has any weight in a post apocalyptic world.  Sooner or later they just plain don’t exist and his stuff is up for grabs.  The strong stick together, the bonds of existence creating the necessity of relationship.  Men return to being men, women respecting their man or they are left behind.

Can I get a big man grunt for that last one?

I like the thought of starting over, of trading the stress of existence for the necessity of survival.  Forget the mortgage payments, the bills, mowing the lawn, going to work each day, trying to figure out where to come up with the money for my daughter’s braces or my son’s sports equipment.

I might even get a regular meal now and then.  If we are focused on coming up with the food, we’re going to cook what we get.

I bet I would be able to ride bicycles every day.  Now there is a thought.

If I were a Walking Dead character who would I be?  Merle?  Rick?  Daryl?  Shane?  No, I would not be a zombie, but there are a few (Sandy) who read this blog that might already be…..