I’m trying to decide if a furnace is really required to live in the Chicago area.  Or running water.  OK, maybe running water because you can only dig so many holes in the back yard.  Does my car need tires or wheels even?  That hole in the roof gives extra ambiance and fresh air.  Driveways and windows are overrated. 

Things get old.  When things get old, they wear out and break.  Things should be fixed, repaired or replaced.

Things make me want to run off to Fiji and join a naked commune that lives on bananas and coconuts and rides bicycles all day.

My house is roughly 26 years old.  The family van and the PT Loser that I drive to work are both 2004 models.  I am a 1961 model. All of them are worn out.  All need a new roof, tread, and just plain don’t want to run any more.  All need more attention than I am able to give or pay for. 

God, this lily of the field needs quite a bit of help.

Being a husband and provider requires energy.  Balance.  An ability to find a way to stay sane while juggling responsibilities that go way beyond anything that could ever be imagined, all by a guy who possesses more will than way.  I try.  I push through, stubborn enough to keep myself from quitting, from going off the deep end to chase that Fiji dream. This husband rarely gets a true break, especially when family and those dreaded things keep needing attention.

This weekend was the furnace.  It works but the blower fan runs constantly.  Until I replaced the thermostat the burners had to be coaxed on.  I have done enough research to figure out the problem, a bad limit switch or a worn out relay on the furnace circuit board, but I am at the point where experience has taught me that digging in could end up costing more than having someone else fix it for me.  So I will call someone to come look at it, someone who will tell me the furnace is worn out and should be replaced.  Duh.

Oh, and my “stay at home” wife refuses to make sure she can be home to let a repair man in our house.  The challenges usually have more than just the mechanical aspect.  The kids can ride the bus home one day, can’t they?  Guess not.

Faith tells me to hang on.  God will provide.  I often forget to look back and see all the obvious times that has happened.  But I could sure use a break, sure need a time when nothing needs to be fixed or repaired or replaced and the larder has a chance to build up a little.  Since kids came along that has been rare if not non-existent. 

OK, well, until Fiji happens….