Kids misbehave in church. A fellow-ette WP blogger just shared the story of how her nine year old boy pouted demonstratively in church this past weekend, drawing a picture of her and stabbing it with her pen. An exorcist may have been in order. She asked her readers to share their own stories of their kids misbehaving in church. That should be a simple task for any churchgoing parent, eh? Not so simple for me. The church I attend has it’s own “Kid’s City” program and most kids don’t see the inside of the adult auditorium during weekend services until they get to high school. Alyssa has been going to services with us for a few years, Nate the freshman just started attending with us this month.
I should have plenty of kids misbehaving in church stories, ought to tell the story of the time that I threw a fit when the communion trays were passed because I wanted some of that grape juice snack. My dad dragged me down the middle aisle between the wooden pews by one arm as I kicked and screamed, then out the big wooden doors and down the concrete steps. Our car was parked in front, the doors didn’t close on their own. Dad wailed on me as the church watched, then guided me in front of him with the tears pouring down my face and dripping off of my chin (but quietly), back up the middle aisle to our seat. It was a small town church. I swear that people started clapping in appreciation for my dad.
I wasn’t going to tell that story. Oops. Should I tell stories from when I was a youth minister now?
Nate’s first adult church service with us was ‘tough’ for him to stomach. After fifteen minutes, he decided he had enough, excused himself to the bathroom and didn’t come back. After waiting ten minutes for him, I turned to Miriam and said “This is not acceptable”, started to get up from my seat to go retrieve our son. Miriam, with a horrified look on her face, put her hand on my arm to stop me.
“It’s OK. Just let him stay out there.”
“No. It’s NOT acceptable.” And my voice began to raise beyond a whisper. Was she really going to let it be like that?
“I’ll go get him. You stay here.”
There were no big wooden doors at the back of the auditorium, no concrete steps, and in today’s social climate I was not going to wail on my son. From the look in Mir’s eyes, however, it was obvious she thought I might. She already thinks I have too much of my father in me, something I don’t understand. My father is a very good, intelligent man who most of the time made the correct decisions when he raised me. Dad wasn’t afraid to discipline, didn’t let me control the situation, because he knew the importance of teaching me by expecting me to behave like a young man. All I was going to do was retrieve our son, stress the importance of staying in church — and behaving like a young adult. Mir pushed past me, over Alyssa, and ten minutes later returned with our brooding son.
There may be more stories to come….
I would have dragged him back in by the ear.
My kids have always joined us in church. We wanted to acclimate them to the environment and let them know they were part of a family unit. We’d take them out when they’d cry. Occasionally we’d bring some snacks or a toy, but not like other parents who basically turned their pew in to a playground, they might as well have left the kids in the nursery. We understood attention spans and all that, we just accommodated according to age. However, as a preteen, I remember needing to go to the “bathroom” a lot during those years. I thought it was better than screaming in the chapel 😉
I may have dragged him in by the ear, also. That’s probably what my dear wife was concerned about. Don’t want to damage his fragile emotions now, do we?
I wanted to bring my kids in more often and like it when other young parents do. My parents did. My wife did not want to do that.
So as Dr. Phil likes to say, “So how’s that working for her?” lol
Backfires each and every day.
I would like to know what you found unacceptable by him leaving?
Nothing unacceptable about him leaving. It was unacceptable that he did not return.
The four siblings behaved rather well in church really but my goofy brother always made it a point to sit next to me and he always snuck in a little toy that he would pull out and dance it on my leg or the bench between us or whatever he could do stealthily so my parents didn’t see him and try to make me laugh. Worked every freaking time and every time I got in trouble for laughing in church. One time he completely made me lose it when he told me right before mass started how he would escape if he were Spiderman. This had me staring at the ceiling and windows the entire mass.
LOL — your brother sounds like an outstanding individual. The whole Spiderman scenario is interesting. Hmmm… I wonder what I will be thinking about in church tomorrow?
Thanks ! nice post !
We had no children’s church or nursery when I was young so from a very early age we had to be in the adult service. It was beyond boring …
True to Dutch tradition my brother and I got two peppermints to get us through the sermon but we were not allowed to make any noise while eating it. We were not allowed to do anything that moved, for that matter. Bathroom visits were strictly forbidden and wiggling because you had to go too. We could not laugh, not talk to each other (not even before church started) and looking at your friends could send you to hell (or so I thought). Mom and dad were sweet but one look from either mom or dad made sure we behaved. I still remember the pokes my mom could give me when she was not happy about my behavior. Ah, those good old days, lol.
For the record … I am not traumatized by it and I had a great childhood! 🙂
And what did you learn from those good old days? I know I learned a lot, especially when I began to appreciate what had bored me as a child. On top of that, I go to a church now that is very entertaining. It’s not the church you and I grew up in!
I actually realized later how much I learned from that “old” church and how much I appreciate the way I’m raised as a child. At the moment still looking for a church to go to, though.
Oooooo, sorry about looking for a church. I thought you found a place you like?
Does it sound weird when I tell you I found them too nice? They allowed for almost anything, didn’t take a stand at all. It was just too soft.
Another church I looked at was so over-enthusiastic that they lost sigh of all nuances. Again not quite what I am looking for. I’ve had my share of lack of nuances 😉
So, still looking. I’m not too bothered by it. I know one day God will show me where to go and stay.
I’ll send you the address to my church. It’s just a short trip.
That would be nice! 😉
Yeah Riete, weren’t you happy at a new place about a year ago? What happened?